Nagisa Watanabe’s Journey from Despair to Renewal: I’ll Challenge Everything

I thought you were sick.

I really wanted to disclose my illness as soon as possible,” she said. But for various reasons, I was unable to do so. I was slandered for not being able to disclose my illness, and I was even slandered by people who said, ‘Isn’t this a temporary illness? I was in a state of conflict for a long time.

Nagisa Watanabe, 27, a former announcer for Fuji Television Network, said, “I was always in a state of conflict.

After graduating from Keio University, Watanabe joined Fuji Television in 2008. She was in charge of popular programs such as “Moshi Moshi Tours” and “Mezamashi TV. However, in July of ’23, it was suddenly announced that he would be taking a leave of absence due to poor health, causing all kinds of speculation.

At the end of August of this year, she left Fuji TV, and on October 1, she announced on her Instagram page that she had been suffering from PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder).

After more than a year of fighting the disease, she faced and overcame past traumas, leading her to confess her illness. Watanabe first developed PTSD in June of last year after a shocking, life-threatening event.

I can’t go into details, but at that point I realized, ‘Oh my God, I’m not going to make it,'” Watanabe said. When I first developed PTSD, I had a hard time dealing with the event, and I didn’t make any progress in my treatment. I still think about it in passing.”

The cause was a sudden trouble. Since then, Watanabe has continued to suffer from the phantom.

It was a rainy day. Recalling the weather, the nearest station, smells, and food at that time triggered a panic attack, and even the slightest noise caused fear, a symptom of PTSD known as “hyper arousal. I could not go to the supermarket to avoid the traumatic foods, and I could not eat properly. But I was so frustrated that my life was taken away from me by the people who gave me PTSD that I went to ……. I kept struggling, visiting those places, trying to somehow get back on my feet.”

I loved my job as an announcer and even considered it my calling. He had landed a big job and was doing well in both his personal and professional life. It was in the midst of all this that the incident occurred. Watanabe was unable to walk, and his doctor recommended hospitalization, forcing him to take an extended leave of absence.

At first I wanted to get back to work as soon as possible,” Watanabe said. But during work, I couldn’t stand up straight because I was shaking, and my manuscripts looked distorted. Even after I was hospitalized last July, the symptoms of hyper-alertness and photosensitivity did not go away, and I realized that it would be difficult to make a fresh start.

Since the trauma was related to the company, even if I could return to work, I did not know when it would recur. I considered filing a police report, but decided to stay put. I made a point of keeping frequent notes, and in my diary at the time I wrote, ‘I should have lived honestly with myself.

Because of this, I was ready to quit the company last fall, a few months after the incident. Everything I cared about spilled out of my hands in an instant, and had I not suffered from PTSD, I probably would have continued working as an announcer for a long time.”

‘Please reconsider.’

Even after being discharged from the hospital, she continued to have difficulty even going out for a while. Even after visiting the hospital, there were no signs of recovery.

Due to the nature of the cognitive-behavioral therapy that Watanabe conducted, it was first necessary to confront the trauma. However, every time he recalled the events of that time, he would have flashbacks. He was repeatedly frustrated and made no progress with the therapy. The fact that he could not confide in his closest colleagues or family members made him feel isolated from society as well. There was no going back to being an announcer – not anymore.

In the spring of this year, Watanabe officially informed Fuji Television of her intention to resign.

At first I told them through my industrial physician, but the company consoled me, saying, ‘Please reconsider. The conversation never progressed, so I consulted with my lawyer, my doctor, and a social worker. I felt I needed to leave the company as soon as possible for the sake of my treatment and to move on with my life.

Although the discussions went on for some time, he felt a little more at ease now that he had made up his mind.

In June, he began undergoing “Continuous Exposure Therapy,” a specialized treatment, to experiment to see how far he could go out alone, and the results began to show. So, after obtaining permission from Fuji, his doctor, and his clinician, he decided to visit the site in early August to watch the men’s volleyball game at the Paris Olympics. As a member of the volleyball club in high school and involved in volleyball broadcasts, Watanabe was eager to witness the spectacle.

However, when the scene was accidentally captured on live video, he was strongly criticized on the Internet.

He said, “This may sound like an excuse, but I had already announced my intention to resign from the company in April and planned to do so by the end of July at the latest. That was delayed for the company’s convenience, saying, ‘We want you to wait until the programming period. I wanted to let them know this.

The treatment was effective, and by July I was gradually able to control my panic attacks. Even as part of the treatment, I had to try an experimental outing.

I apologize to anyone who was offended, but I myself am glad I went from the bottom of my heart. It was a truly moving experience, and it gave me hope to live in Paris, and it gave me energy for tomorrow.”

What is Watanabe Nagisa worth?

Why did Watanabe continue to report her situation on SNS in the face of criticism? This is what she had in mind.

I felt that if I told my family and friends, they would have to bear the burden. That’s why it was easier for me to tell my story on social networking sites. When I looked at the messages from people suffering from mental illness, I found similar opinions. Rather than negative opinions, the positive words of those who supported me gave me tremendous energy. While I was anxious about being separated from society, your warm words really helped me.”

In October, he reported that his specialized treatment had ended early. After her battle with the disease, Watanabe confided with determination, “I would also like to engage in activities to deepen understanding of mental illness.

There is no concept of a cure, so I don’t know when I will relapse again. I have fear, but I will have to live with PTSD for the rest of my life. But on the other hand, there are cases like mine where I can get so well. I also learned firsthand the importance of treatment and having the right knowledge. Unlike depression, there are very few stories about PTSD on the Internet. I would be happy if I can encourage sufferers even a little by sharing my experiences.

In the future, she intends to actively take on extra-curricular activities such as lectures and talks at the Faculty of Psychology, which she has been asked to do. His current title on his business card is ″freelance announcer,″ but he says he does not intend to stick with it on a temporary basis.

My mother told me, ‘I’m not an announcer, because I quit after about three years. My mother said to me, ‘What value is there in Nagisa Watanabe if she is not an announcer? I think that is also true. Even so, I have now decided, “I will try everything I want to do. I think that will probably lead to the most happiness. I would also like to study psychology professionally, and in the future, I hope to start a support group for women who are experiencing difficulties in their lives.

During the interview, Watanabe repeatedly said, “I don’t want to have any more regrets. Her expression was strong and cheerful.

From “FRIDAY” November 15, 2024 issue