“Gross,” “I’m totally done”… Kids at a loss for words: “Everything’s ‘awful'”—A Report from the Classroom
The more children lack the “power of words” rooted in a strong vocabulary, the more likely they are to struggle with various issues such as bullying, school refusal, and school violence.
If they cannot put their feelings into words, it can lead to stress and emotional outbursts, or they may tend to give up, thinking, “No one understands me” or “There’s nothing I can do.” As a result, they become unable to solve the challenges right in front of them and move forward.
Today’s children tend to describe everything and anything using extreme words like “crazy,” “annoying,” “gross,” or “extreme.” However, simply repeating “crazy, crazy” when trouble arises won’t change anything. They are unable to devise solutions, convey their thoughts to others, or reach mutual understanding with others.
My book, *Children Who Can’t “Communicate with Words”* (Nihon Jitsugyo Publishing), released this past July, went into a major reprint before it even hit the shelves and has continued to be reprinted since.
Repeated Use of “Yabai”
A veteran elementary school teacher featured in the book says:
“Disorder in children’s language is directly linked to disorder in their daily lives. Children cannot understand one another, cannot express their own feelings, cannot consider the feelings of others, and cannot cooperate as a group. All of these issues stem from disorder in their language.
However, these days, it’s not just parents—daycare workers, instructors at extracurricular classes, and even celebrities and YouTubers constantly spout ‘yabai’ and lack a diverse vocabulary. When that happens, no matter how much we teach precise language in school and encourage students to ‘think carefully in words’ and ‘express themselves clearly,’ it simply doesn’t resonate with them at all.”
When you think about it, the problems occurring in the adult world—such as communication difficulties, hate speech, conspiracy theories, and defamation—stem from people who cannot use language accurately, thinking and expressing themselves with crude language.
Perhaps the reason this book has become a hit is that “the inability to communicate through words” is a problem affecting Japanese society as a whole—adults included.
Why do children try to express things using only extreme language?
This book analyzes the factors in detail, and one issue cited as stemming from early childhood is the decline in opportunities for adults and children to exchange words.
In their daily lives, children acquire new vocabulary by having parents and other adults articulate their inner thoughts or describe the events unfolding before them. Furthermore, through activities such as having picture books read aloud to them, they learn words that aren’t commonly used in everyday conversation.
However, as statistics clearly show, the amount of time parents and children spend talking is steadily decreasing. The following is a quote from a preschool teacher featured in the book:
“I think smartphones are the main reason for the decline in parent-child conversation. It’s not uncommon for children today to spend four or five hours a day on screens by the time they’re about three years old. Parents spend even more time on them. As a result, they’re glued to their smartphones not only while dropping off and picking up their children at daycare, but also during meals and at all other times as well.
Furthermore, even if we teach them words at the preschool, they won’t truly make them their own unless they use them during private time with family and friends. The words don’t become part of who they are.Today’s children have more opportunities to learn language as an academic subject, but since they don’t use it while playing, they can’t master it as their own. That’s why it’s no longer uncommon to see children around the age of two who only say things like ‘That’s bad’ or ‘That’s annoying.’”
This book details methods for nurturing language skills while using smartphones and playing video games. However, without this knowledge, smartphones and games will end up robbing children of their language abilities. Even as these children move on to elementary and middle school, the environment doesn’t change much.
Even if they study hard and learn a lot of words, shared experiences—such as playing sports or participating in events with their peers—are decreasing year by year, so the classroom tends to be filled with nothing but coarse language.
“I’m totally done” during cooking class
There’s an interesting anecdote shared in this book. It goes like this:
During a home economics cooking class, while trying to make tomato sauce, one boy accidentally boiled the tomato stems (the green parts) along with the tomatoes. Immediately, the other students shouted in unison, “Gross,” “This guy’s a mess,” and “We’re totally screwed.” As a result, the boy was so hurt that he stopped going to school—
Think about it.
Just because he boiled the tomato stem doesn’t mean it was gross, “crazy,” or “totally over,” does it? They’re simply reacting reflexively with such harsh words whenever something unexpected happens.
But how does that make the person on the receiving end feel? If someone tells you you’re “gross,” “crazy,” or “done for” just for boiling a tomato stem, it’s only natural that you’d feel depressed and afraid to be around your friends.
This is the story of an elementary school teacher featured in this book.
“The coarseness of language is also striking online. On social media, exchanges consist mostly of single words, and harsh language flies back and forth on a daily basis. Many children end up completely exhausted by this.
Kids these days often use the word ‘pressure.’ They say things like, ‘The pressure in the classroom is intense’ or ‘The pressure in our group LINE chat is crazy.’ Because harsh language is constantly flying around them, students have to be constantly on edge and on guard to protect their own mental well-being. They’re becoming exhausted by it.”
Neither parents nor teachers seem to realize this fact. This is because they themselves use similarly coarse language, so they don’t stop to consider how much it’s hurting the children.
Unfortunately, it’s said that economic disparities within families play no small role in this.
High-income adults possess the ability to resolve issues through language and tend to help their children acquire a rich vocabulary. Furthermore, by providing diverse experiences, they help the children internalize the words they’ve learned. Consequently, children from high-income households find it easier to acquire the power of language.
However, the book *Children Who Struggle to Communicate with Words* offers numerous tips on how to overcome this disparity with just a little ingenuity. What we must learn are the methods for acquiring the “power of language.”
In [Part 2], we’ll introduce specific techniques for helping children build their vocabulary.
Reporting and Text： Kota Ishii (Nonfiction Writer) PHOTO： Afro