“Here’s How to Handle It”—Hidehiko Ishizuka’s Practical Tips for Relating to Overweight People

I will teach you how to deal with people like me.

Greetings, everyone. I’m Hidehiko Ishizuka, enjoying Okinawa while in Setagaya by putting blue bath salts in the bathtub and wearing a swim cap and goggles.

This time, I’d like to explain how to handle people like us (fat people). I’m sure you have some large coworkers, bosses, or clients around you. If you read my instruction manual beforehand, even important business negotiations will be settled instantly. Today’s theme is entertaining and drinking with us (fat people).

First, regarding the season for holding drinking parties: winter is best, and the rainy season and summer are NG. Fat people are bad with heat.

The time of year when we are most lively is January or February. In winter our minds feel clear, and we smile constantly. On the other hand, from June to August our T-shirts are always damp with sweat, and just leaving the house and coming home is hard labor. When I appeared in a drama, I only accepted roles filmed in winter.

For the location, choose somewhere close to the station. Inside the station is even better. Big-bodied people are not fond of walking. Walking more than five minutes is practically a sport.

A restaurant on the first floor is ideal. A third floor in a building with no elevator is NG. Once our heart rate goes up, it does not return to normal for three minutes. What should be a fun drinking party will turn into, “Who picked this place!?” and you’ll incur our anger.

When choosing the type of seating, avoid floor seating. If we sit cross-legged, we can only reach the dishes right in front of us. At a tatami banquet, we can’t reach the chawanmushi in the back.

The exception is if your guest is a sumo wrestler. Since they usually eat on tatami, they might actually prefer floor seating.

Next, air conditioning. Check whether the room temperature can be adjusted separately. It’s common to ask the staff to lower the temperature in a private room and be told, “Sorry, all the air conditioning is connected.” Large people are often very gentle, so we just reply, “I see,” and quietly wipe the sweat from our foreheads with a lukewarm hand towel.

A User Manual for Big People: Food and Restrooms

Next, the types of food. Kaiseki cuisine is often chosen for business entertainment, but what we really want is fried chicken. Our bodies are made of 50% meat, 40% fried food. Huh, the remaining 10%? Of course, cola.

We, too, appreciate the craftsmanship behind kaiseki cuisine. But look at the face of a big person at the moment when lemon is squeezed over fried chicken. They are smiling frighteningly wide.

As for restrooms in restaurants, they must absolutely be Western-style toilets. For big people, the act of squatting is torture. If we squat, we fall backward within three seconds.

By the way, on the filming schedule for “Ganso! Debuya” (TV Tokyo), a show I did with Papaya Suzuki, some restaurants had a letter “Y” beside their names, and some did not. “Y” meant “Western-style toilet available.” You could feel the director’s love for big people.

This may be difficult, but ideally the restaurant’s chef should also be on the bigger side. They are more likely to serve flavors and portion sizes that suit our preferences.

At “Grill Suzukou,” a restaurant near Kamata Station that I visit privately, the chef is a former sumo wrestler, so the restaurant is chilled like a refrigerator, and the hand towels are frozen.

Did this user manual help you? May you smile when you see the smile of a big person.

From the November 28 and December 5, 2025 issue of “FRIDAY”