Why Romantic Manipulation Never Fades Even When Love Turns to Hate

On March 7, a cabinet decision was made to revise the Entertainment Business Act, which will prohibit “romantic sales tactics.” But will this really put an end to such practices? In this second part, adult entertainment journalist Akira Ikoma introduces several recent incidents involving romantic entanglements.

Part 1: The seductive techniques of serious love sales that drove a customer in his 30s to kill a soapland worker.

They started visiting the shop after being drawn in by a live stream

On March 11, a 22-year-old woman who was live streaming on the streets of Takadanobaba in Shinjuku, Tokyo, was fatally stabbed with a survival knife by a man in his 40s, who was also a viewer of her stream. The suspect began visiting the cabaret club where the woman worked after discovering her through her live stream. He reportedly lent her around 2.5 million yen, which led to a financial dispute and ultimately escalated into the fatal attack.

A similar incident occurred in May 2024, also sparked by a live stream connection, involving a romance sales situation at a girls’ bar.

In the grounds of a high-rise apartment complex in Shinjuku, Tokyo, a woman in her 20s was fatally stabbed by a man in his 50s. The man had previously been a customer at the girls’ bar the woman managed. He sold his prized car and motorcycle, among other personal belongings, to gather funds, which he claimed were deceived out of him. Consumed by resentment, he carried out the attack.

According to the man’s father, the woman had told him, “If you’re serious about marrying me, sell your car and motorcycle and turn them into money.” He gave her over 10 million yen as startup funds for the girls’ bar. However, after handing over the money, the woman became distant, and when talk of ending the relationship arose, tensions escalated.

Their first contact came through the woman’s live stream on social media, which the man participated in. He later became a regular at the girls’ bar where she worked. The man repeatedly stalked her and was arrested in May 2022 for violating the anti-stalking law.

At the time, he was reportedly outraged, saying things like, “I gave her a huge amount of money. I just wanted it back, and while I was waiting to see her, I got warned by the police. Why am I being treated like a criminal when I’m the victim?”

After his release, a restraining order was issued. However, it expired just under a year before the incident. Since the stalking had seemingly ceased and the woman had requested to end the police protection, the order was lifted.

When One-Sided Feelings Turn into Deadly Intent

The man seemed to believe, “I’m in a relationship with her. We promised to get married.” Customers who lack financial stability and act purely on their feelings for a woman are particularly prone to becoming stalkers. When they feel, “I spent all this money on you!”, their affection can turn into resentment—and sometimes even murderous intent. In this case, the man brought two fruit knives and repeatedly stabbed the woman in the stomach and chest.

Live streaming, which has recently grown in popularity, appears to be difficult to make a full-time living from. Many female streamers reportedly also work part-time at cabaret clubs or girls’ bars. In some cases, women whose main job is at nightclubs use livestreaming to attract customers. When a viewer gets to meet a streamer in person, they may begin to feel like they are someone special—but just like in the nightlife industry, their hospitality is ultimately a part of the job. It’s crucial to remember that.

Another incident involving a girls’ bar occurred in October 2024 in Shinbashi, Tokyo. An 18-year-old female employee was fatally stabbed in the neck by a man in his 40s with a fruit knife. Her body had more than a dozen stab and cut wounds to the neck and face, indicating strong murderous intent. The man reportedly traveled over two hours from Gunma Prefecture once or twice a month to see her, and after his arrest, stated, “She told me she didn’t want to meet outside of the shop, and that made me angry.”

Lastly, though not directly related to sex work or hostessing, a high-profile scam involving so-called romance sales also made headlines. It involved a woman who turned this tactic into a manualized scam under the persona “Itadaki Joshi Riri-chan.”

In August 2023, a 25-year-old woman, claiming to be a sex industry worker, was arrested by the Aichi Prefectural Police for aiding fraud. She had posed on social media as “Itadaki Joshi Riri-chan” and scammed three men she met through dating apps out of approximately 155 million yen (over 1 million USD).

Will the revised Entertainment Business Law eliminate love-based?

The woman made the men develop romantic feelings for her and deceived them by saying things like “I need a severance payment to cut ties with my parents” in order to take money from them. She also sold a “romance manual” that described methods for deceiving men into giving money, helping buyers commit fraud. The content of the romance manual was, “By pretending to be a poor woman raised in a bad family environment and engaging in ‘mental illness営業’ (pretending to be mentally ill to solicit money), you can get large amounts of money.”

She referred to the targeted men as “oji” (uncle). The “oji” she targeted were men who were “serious and saving diligently,” “didn’t care about brand-name items and seemed poor,” and who were regulars at certain establishments such as “places where talk takes priority over play” or “people who have visited twice or more with a fixed reservation.” These men, who were described as “mentally unsatisfied,” were easy to deceive. The key was to make the customer feel like “I want to help her” or “I’ll take care of it.”

The woman had become a charismatic figure in the “papa-katsu” (sugar dating) world. However, while “papa-katsu” involves receiving financial support in exchange for dates or sexual activities, “itadaki-joshi” (taking women) is different: it involves creating trust, revealing fake problems, and unilaterally receiving large sums of money. Although she called it receiving, it was a clear crime of lying to take money.

The woman used the money obtained from her crimes to lavish it on hosts. In January 2025, she received a final verdict of 8 years and 6 months in prison and a fine of 8 million yen. The “romance manual” can be seen as a fraud manual explaining techniques of love-based marketing.

Even with the revision of the Entertainment Business Law prohibiting it, love-based marketing is unlikely to disappear because customers seek it. Many men use establishments like adult entertainment and hostess bars to buy romantic experiences they cannot have in their daily lives. For them, love is something they are willing to pay for.

However, the lesson we can learn from the incidents involving love-based marketing is that, even when paying for romantic experiences, “you should never give away large sums of money easily.” Time spent with women in the adult industry is ultimately just a fleeting dream. There is no need to sacrifice your wealth, which is almost as important as your life, to obtain it.