Mother Outraged as School Dismisses Oiso Bullying with “Just Ignore It” Response

“The school did not take proper action, despite my son being bullied for five years.”

These are the words of the mother of Mr. A, who suffered severe bullying in elementary school.

A serious case of bullying occurred at an elementary school in Oiso Town, Kanagawa Prefecture. Mr. A, who was a 5th-grade student at the time (now a 1st-year middle school student), had been bullied by a group of students since entering school, to the point where he was driven to the brink of taking his own life. Despite his parents repeatedly requesting the school to take action, the situation did not improve. It was only after A-kun transferred to another school due to the unbearable suffering that the incident was officially recognized as a serious case under the Bullying Prevention Act. A third-party committee is currently investigating the matter.

Mr. A’s mother shared her thoughts (comments without specific attribution are from the mother).

“The bullying started when he was in the first grade. I noticed that my son’s gym clothes bag had been torn several times, but at first, I thought he might have just been rough with it. However, during a classroom observation, I saw a classmate actually tearing the bag. That same child frequently called my son, who has a larger build, names like ‘Hey, fatty, you’re in the way,’ and harassed him on the way home from school. Even after reporting this to his homeroom teacher and the vice principal, the bullying did not stop.”

 

“I want them to resolve it on their own.”

 There were several bullying groups both inside and outside the class, and even as the grade level increased, the attacks on Mr. A continued.

“My son’s backpack was repeatedly kicked, and his shoes were often thrown out of the shoe rack. He was constantly called names in a mocking tone, and the bullies even tried to cover up their actions by warning him, ‘Don’t snitch.’ Their methods were particularly insidious. The stress from the bullying caused him to develop a tic, making him blink forcefully, and he also began suffering from stomach pain.”

The bullying group frequently skipped class to hang out in the restroom, shouting loudly and causing disturbances. By the time Mr. A reached the fourth grade, the bullying escalated even further.

“They slapped him near the face and even took his test papers, ripping them up and throwing them away. During lunchtime, they would serve his food while mocking him, saying things like ‘Fatty, don’t eat!’ As a result, he often found that there was almost no food left for him. My son reported these incidents to his homeroom teacher, but his complaints were completely ignored.”

Mr. A was unable to calmly go to the bathroom, and he couldn’t eat his lunch properly, leading to frequent early departures from school. He was also told by the bullying group, “I want to push you down the stairs,” and he was forced to constantly watch his back while at school.

His mother repeatedly reported the bullying to the school, while his father wrote letters to the principal demanding appropriate action. However, the school responded with shocking statements such as, “Minor bullying should be resolved on their own,” and “Mr. A lacks the ability to ignore it (the bullying).”

 

“Since we couldn’t expect anything from anyone, I consulted with the town councilors and the mayor, but the principal only said, ‘The school is taking action, so there’s nothing to worry about.’ My son asked the homeroom teacher for help more than 10 times, but was told, ‘You’re being persistent, don’t make eye contact with the bullies.’ Over time, the bullying group started to make verbal attacks on him during dismissal, and my son began experiencing symptoms like chest pain, trembling hands, and tears due to stress.

By the time he reached 5th grade, the stress from the bullying worsened his pre-existing bronchial asthma, and he began saying things like, ‘If this continues, my mind will break, and I’ll never be able to go back,’ and ‘I’m not living to be bullied.’ He felt it was impossible and decided to transfer to a school in a neighboring town. After that, he no longer faced bullying, which made the severity of the past five years more apparent.”

The Ministry of Education’s guidelines for serious bullying incidents stipulate that if the victim transfers schools, the school must take appropriate action. However, the school acted as if they didn’t know anything about the transferred student and failed to investigate the bullying.

“When we asked for an investigation, they told us, ‘We have no records or memories of your son’s bullying.’ They didn’t even provide guidance to the parents of the bullying group. One reason for hiding the bullying could be that the bullying group had a child of a town councilor (at the time), and the school and board of education had strong connections with management positions.

Since it’s a small town, there was an unspoken atmosphere that you shouldn’t say anything about the children of influential people. In fact, when my husband asked the principal to address the town councilor’s child, he was told, ‘I can’t because we’re close friends with the parents.’ Another town councilor even told us, ‘Everyone knows about your son’s bullying, but since the parents are influential, they won’t take proper action.'”

 

Should be strictly pursued.

 Due to the fear that the bullying might be denied, the mother requested the town for disclosure of information in April 2023. As a result, the town’s Board of Education reversed its stance and recognized the situation as a serious bullying case. The disclosed documents revealed that there had been a sloppy management system in place.

“The attendance records disclosed showed that the 65 days of early departures my son had when he was in the 4th grade were all marked as attended. With this, it’s inevitable that people would think the school was covering up the bullying. I can’t believe that a school would have no record of bullying while doing something like this. If the school doesn’t change, the same thing will happen again. Currently, the third-party committee is investigating the bullying my son experienced, and I want them to clarify the facts and establish a system where bullying will never happen again.”

What does the elementary school think about these facts of bullying? When asked about the reasons for not taking appropriate action, the principal of the school responded, “The town’s Board of Education will handle the interview.” When questions were sent again to the Oiso Town Board of Education, they replied, “Since a third-party investigation into the serious bullying case is currently being conducted, we will refrain from providing responses regarding individual cases.” (School Education Division, Education Guidance Section)

According to the Ministry of Education, Culture, Sports, Science, and Technology (MEXT), the number of serious bullying cases reported in elementary and middle schools nationwide reached a record high of 1,306 in fiscal 2023. Suicides believed to be caused by bullying continue to occur. Lawyer Tomonori Takahashi, an expert in bullying issues, criticizes the school for its failure to take appropriate action:

“Normally, when the victim’s guardian reports potential bullying, the school should immediately conduct an investigation and take action. In this case, the child was so mentally distressed that he had to transfer schools, yet the school didn’t take any anti-bullying measures until that point. This should be severely scrutinized. When the investigation begins, some teachers will flip their stance and say, ‘I thought it was a problem,’ so it’s also necessary to leave evidence, such as recordings.”

If bullying is allowed to continue, it could lead to a serious situation where the victim might take their own life. It is crucial for not only parents but also schools and teachers to respond properly and address problems while they are still small.

 

From the communication notebook, it is clear that Mr. A was leaving early almost every day (photo is partially processed).