Freelance Announcer Aika Kanda on Her Biggest Challenge Before Publishing Her Book

On Monday, the 8th of this month, the book that compiles this series, “Where is the Royal Road, the Road of the King? will be released. For me, it is a memorable first book in my life.

In the same office, there are a number of girls who have managed to publish photo books within a few years of belonging to the same agency. Immediately after graduating from college, I became a weather girl. Her cuteness and her poor performance combined to make men in the world want to “root for her! This, combined with her cuteness and poor performance, made men in the world want to support her, and many “paying fans” were born, and they decided to publish her photo book. That is the royal road to success in our office.

As for me, I joined NHK after graduating from college. (If I read that wrong, I might be suspended!) ) and read the news with eyes like the end of the world, and at the age of 32, I joined my current firm. Believing her seniors’ advice, “Feminine fragility is not necessary for the job! I believed the advice of my seniors and started my freelance career. I am sure that no one will say to me, “I want to support you with my own money! I am sure that no one would want to support me at their own expense. As proof, my calendars, which were sold for the first two years of my freelance career, were discontinued in the third year when the production company said, “Kanda-san is not selling well, so we want to stop selling them.

Thus, as the title of the book suggests, the first book was published in a way that deviated from the high road of the office. The serialization project and the content of the book both took a path that was completely off the high road to the release date. The details are summarized in the “Afterword” of the book, so please read it.

This book is filled with my thoughts and feelings over the past 12 years since I became a freelancer. I wanted to share them with you all!　So one weekend in May, I decided to stay in a hotel for three nights and four days to concentrate on the work.

However, around 6 a.m. on the second day, a “sudden incident” occurred. My husband’s line rang and when I read it through my sleepy eyes, he said, “Sorry. I read the message, “Sorry, I peed in my sleep. I jumped out of bed in surprise. （What?　Why?　I don’t understand!) I wanted to reply, “I’m sorry,” but I didn’t want to get into a fight right now. I held back and replied, “How long?” I replied. Just a little. Just a little on the sheets,” said my husband. （I wanted to reply, “What kind of state is it in?) I wanted to reply, “I see. Send me a picture,” I replied. I looked at the picture and found a brownish liquid about 10 cm long by 1.5 cm wide smeared on the plain white sheets. (This is just a little bit!　Impossible!) I suppressed the words, “What happened?” I replied. I farted in my sleep and it came out. (You should have known before you farted!!!). I suppressed my maximum anger and said, “Leave it as it is. I’ll wash it as soon as I get home.

 

Did ‘poop’ attract itself to the book!?

In our household, such unusual events that are unthinkable in normal circumstances happen frequently. That’s why it’s nearly impossible to work calmly at home. So this time, I made the decision to lock myself in a hotel for a few days to avoid being influenced by whatever happens at home.

I debated whether to remotely instruct my husband, who has never striped sheets or washed by hand, from 6 a.m. But that would lead to sleep deprivation and affect my writing. Right now, focusing on the manuscript is crucial! I resolved to leave the poop untouched until I returned home.

During that time, I never dared to ask how my husband managed to sleep. It was too scary to inquire. However, by mentally excluding household chores, I managed to check and refine all 224 pages twice.

Monday arrived. I finished “Pokapoka” and finally returned home to face the sheets with poop stains. Nervously glancing into the living room, I saw vacuumed floors and neatly folded laundry. His remorse was evident.

And so, into the bedroom I went, there it was, a yellow-brown stain on the pristine white sheets, daaang!! “Ah, I see. it’s actually quite a decent size,” I muttered to myself, and my inner homemaker switch flipped ON. I peeled off the sheets and scrubbed vigorously by hand. Though a faint stain remained, I threw them into the washing machine with a thud! Opting for a thorough cycle, I hung them on the balcony. Despite faint yellowish spots remaining, they fluttered gracefully in the breeze. Wondering about my life, I couldn’t help but think, “Well, maybe this means my book really does have poop in it?”

And thus, my first essay book was born. I hope many people will read it. Thank you very much.

Now on sale: “Where is the Road Called Royal Road?

Kanda Aika / Born in 1980 in Kanagawa Prefecture. After graduating from the Department of Mathematics at Gakushuin University, she joined NHK as an announcer in 2003. She left NHK in 2012 and became a freelance announcer. Since then, she has been active mainly in variety shows and currently serves as the main MC on the daytime program “Pokapoka” (Fuji Television).

From the July 19, 2024 issue of FRIDAY