The experience of using an app for married couples, which is different from other apps.

• What are Married Matchmaking Apps?

In the past three years, a number of matching apps that claim to be “exclusively for married couples” have appeared on the market, and they are apparently quite successful. The monthly fee for men is around 6,000 to 10,000 yen, while women are, of course, free. Considering that a typical matching app costs around 4,000 yen, this is a bit expensive. The price range seems to be closer to that of the daddy dating apps that are popular among middle-aged men. The term “extramarital romance” is used frequently on the apps. When a married man uses a matching app, one might think, “Isn’t that adultery? But what is the difference? I actually experienced it.

• Matching and messaging are not simple

The ratio of men to women is about 8:2. As with most matching apps, there is a predominance of women. Since this is an app for married couples only, less than half of the users put their profile pictures on the app. Even if they do, most of them are either blurred out or very close-up. This is not surprising considering the risk of identity theft. Due to the difference in the ratio of men to women, I had a hard time finding a match at first, just like on regular matching apps.

Messaging was also very difficult. Since our profiles only included blurry photos of each other, we were asked to exchange photos at an early stage. Even if I sent a photo, I was immediately blocked if I was not good-looking enough. I can understand why married people would take the risk of dating. However, most of the time the women are reasonably good-looking and appropriate for their age….

Also, many women avoid “meeting right away. Many of them write in their profiles, “I prefer someone with whom I can exchange casual conversation on LINE every day,” but in short, they do not want someone whom they can contact only when they meet, like a friendship. In order to confirm this, they seem to have set a reasonably long message period before meeting. However, these are the type of people who are completely passive, answering questions if we ask them, but never asking questions of their own. It was quite an arduous task to continue messaging with them. I wonder if many of them are not used to using apps.

• Alafi Women of a Different Color

Perhaps some of you may be thinking, “Women of the older, arafifteen generation may be easier to meet because they are less drawn to us. But let me tell you that it is rather super difficult.

Women of this generation spent their youth in the 1990s. They married early and many of them are full-time housewives. Now that their children have flown the nest, many of them don’t talk with their husbands, let alone spend the night with them, and the stress is mounting. However, this is a generation where men have the value of “providing for” women. Therefore, they tend to be more demanding than other generations.

The app has a bulletin board for members, where they can search for a partner and exchange opinions, and there are many comments from women in their late 20s, such as “I deserve to have my date paid for,” “If you don’t have money, don’t get involved in extramarital affairs,” “Esthetics, hair and makeup, and other things cost women a lot,” and “Dinner courses that cost around 20,000 yen are good. I prefer a course that costs around 20,000 yen for dinner. I want a course that costs around 20,000 yen for dinner. If it’s not in a private room, I can’t afford it. Women of other generations have also complained that they don’t want to be like her. Competition aside, there are many difficult women out there.

However, if you persistently screen your search, you will be able to match with a certain number of women. Although I struggled with messages, I was able to meet three women.

• Woman 1) 44 years old, just answering questions.

It was relatively quick to meet, and three days after we matched, we decided to meet face to face. Anyway, while many people have a hard time matching and messages do not last, it is nice to hear from someone who is quick to talk.

The woman who showed up at the meeting place was a woman with black-rimmed glasses wearing a pastel-colored shirt. She looked about her age, like a younger version of Masako Motai.

How old is your child?

He is in the first year of junior high school.

So your child is much younger now, and you can go out more easily.

Yes, that’s right.

If I asked her a question, she would answer, but there was no question from her. Is she not interested in me? Of course, she has her own preferences in appearance and so on. However, I don’t care if she’s a 20-something year old girl who is looking for a daddy’s girl, we are both adults. It’s normal to want to make the time we spend together as meaningful as possible….

When I asked her what kind of date she wanted to have, she said “watching a movie together…” But if the conversation was like this, we would both be online at home. But if our conversation was like this, we might as well enjoy watching Netflix at home. Still, we managed to talk for about an hour, and when I looked at the app after we broke up, it was blocked.

• Woman 2: Experienced with dating apps & photo fraud 47 years old

Although the photo was blurry, she had a short cut and looked like Yuriko Ishida, and was somewhat slender, so I went to the meeting with high expectations.

I had a bad feeling that I would be about 30 minutes late due to traffic, when I received a call saying, “Excuse me, I’ve arrived in front of the store. When I got there, I found not Yuriko Ishida but a middle-aged woman who looked like Akitakejo. The photo was rather slim, but I had been fooled by the “glamour” in her profile, which was a so-called “photo deception.

I was hungry, so we had lunch and talked. He was a good communicator as well as a good-looking guy, and we had a good conversation. I asked her about it, and she told me that she used to play with younger men on dating apps and had several “boyfriends” in the past. Hearing that she had been using dating apps, I was convinced of the photo fraud.

After we broke up, I received a thank-you message from her, to which I replied, “I hope we can meet again slowly this time,” but she probably took “slowly” to mean “slowly” and never replied. I sent the message as a social comment, but it didn’t make sense to me.

• Woman 3) A 40-year-old who was particular about the date

Just when I was feeling tired, I met a 40-year-old woman who had just registered with the site. Since we often went to the same area, I introduced her some restaurants I had been to, and we talked about “Let’ s go sometime. I thought it was unusual for a woman to specify a date, so I managed to adjust my schedule and we made an appointment.

The woman who showed up at the meeting place was a slightly taller, attractive woman with a family of four, both working, and she worked in the planning department of a manufacturer, juggling both work and child rearing. Her husband was busy with work and didn’t seem to listen to her much, and she was dissatisfied with that, so she registered with the application. She was frustrated with this, so she registered on the app. Normally it is difficult for her to go out frequently because of her work, but on the day she requested, her husband was away and her child was at home, so she chose the date.

We had a lot in common with each other in terms of hobbies and interests, and we had a lot of fun. We broke up that day and met again a few days later, this time for drinks in Ebisu, a fashionable area of Tokyo, and since she liked to drink, it was quite lively. I guessed that was what she meant, and when I asked her to go to a hotel, she said yes, so we went to bed!　It took a few twists and turns to get to this point, but we were able to reach our goal. I still see her once or twice a month. It may be rare to go to a hotel on the first date, but if you can ask her out on a second date, it seems that in most cases, the relationship will progress into a “deep relationship.

Even if a couple’s relationship is not going well, there are more and more places for women to “take a break” with men other than their husbands. For men, it has a stronger romantic element than “papa katsu” and is easier on the pocketbook. The number of people interested in such “extramarital romance” may increase in the future. However, be careful not to get too carried away, as the other party is married.